ect things. Why should that change now?"
"That was before," Spyder said, groping for words. "I was going to say the world has changed, but it hasnt. Im changed. And I fucking hate it. I take back what I said about Sam Spade and knowing things. I enjoyed my ignorance. Give me three wishes and thats what Id ask for first. "
"Reality sucks," said Lulu sitting up on the chairs. "But, if you wait long enough, everything becomes normal. Youll see. "
Looking out the studio window onto Haight Street, Spyder watched the people outside going through their happy, blind lives. Couples were going to dinner, ducking into bars. On the corner, a girl with blue hair was kissing a boy in a cop shirt and vinyl shorts. Softly Spyder sang, "When Im lyin in my bed at night, I dont wanna grow up, Nothin ever seems to turn out right, I dont wanna grow up. " He looked at Lulu. "Know that song?"
"Tom Waits. Jenny gave me the CD for my birthday. "
"When I see the price that you pay, I dont wanna grown up, I dont ever wanna be that way, I dont wanna grow up…?" For the first time, Spyder was glad that Jenny had left him. He couldnt imagine trying to explain all this to her. Where was she right that second? Was she happy? He hoped so.
Nine
Hard Thanks
Spyder straightened up when he realized that he and Lulu were no longer alone.
Three smiling men, dressed like bankers in an old movie, were standing in the studio. One of the men carried a large snake-skin ledger. All three men were very pale and carried long, curved knives in their belts. The banker in the middle was wearing the face of the businessman Spyder had spoken to in t
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